Today my visa was approved to live in Spain for at least 9 months. I will not be back. It will be the longest time spent away from my family ever, unless they decide to visit me. which my parents may do. Anyhow, as a way to procrastinate my packing (I leave Saturday afternoon) I began thinking tonight about where I really want to live, where I want to settle when I come back and where I’ve always dreamed of living. Here’s a hint, it’s not Indiana or anywhere else in the midwest. Why do I have this dream of California? The excitement and the weather perhaps? What makes people happy where they live? All I know is that I need something more than what I have had living in Cincinnati and Indiana, and more recently, Costa Rica. What I did learn from Costa Rica is that I want to be able to walk places, or more truthfully, I want to have to walk places. Anyhow, just my late night thoughts on happiness and living. After visiting my sister and brother-in-law in Manhatten, their new home, I knew that I would also be happy there – who wouldn’t? So as I prepare to move to a city I’ve never been to for I have no idea how long, I just think about choices we give ourselves and decisions we make and why. If I really wanted to be in California or New York City, I would be there. But I applied to this program for a very specific reason – I want to be in Spain. I made huge efforts to prepare myself for this and I knew that if it was meant to be it would work out. So far, it has. I have no idea what my future career will be or whether I will continue my graduate studies in Spanish, but I do know one thing – I need to stop thinking ahead and daydreaming and believe that this experience will be well worth the costs, money-wise and personal. I need to accept the idea that it is okay to not know what is next. Beyond what I can picture, beyond my goals I know I am on the right path. Tomorrow I head to Chicago to pick up my visa.
September 27, 2007...3:56 am
Your Visa has been approved
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